WRITER'S BLOCK

What’s “PS” going to write about next? Could it be about the tasty bagel place in Bedford? Will he riff on a subject currently trending in our subculture? Will he go off about the gay bashing bible thumpers out of Topeka, Kansas? Who’s he going to befriend or offend next!?!?!

            A while back, I spoke with Johnny V “Mr. Bassist” about writing articles on a regular basis, and when I mean “a while back”, when my heated seats were just for decoration and spinning out on the road was more intentional than accidental, Before Mr. Bassist and myself spoke about the Identity that is now ‘Positive Sarcasm’, I mentioned that if I could make it to ten articles, I’d have no problem reaching fifty…cough.

            Sure there are weekends where the subject matter is killer and the words roll off the tongue like a Latin lover stealing your partner like some kind of Don Juan DeManwhore. Other days, one is simply smashing their forehead against the keyboard in hopes of forming some kind of readable sentence. I’ll compare it to a guitar player sitting in a makeshift studio, flicking the same two chords over and over again in hopes of hitting something by accident and having that “EUREKA!” moment. Actually, have you ever heard a guitarist ever say “EUREKA!”? Have you ever heard ANYONE use the word after discovering something great? Besides those pretend Geeks on “The Big Bang Theory”, I think this word has seen its last days and will hopefully fade away into oblivion. Normally when a guitarist discovers a new riff, he turns to the producer and shouts, “F*#k, this is good dope!”

            It’s not that I’m out of ideas; it’s that, like a good hurricane, or typhoon if you live near the pacific, the subject matter needs the right environment to form into something stronger. Otherwise that category-5 sputters down to a warm fart in the shower. It needs the right  ambiance, music, tea, coffee, booze, or tobacco. But your tools can’t become a distraction during the process. You can write to the ‘The Eels’ on low volume with a small glass of green tea or a jigger of rum over ice. However, blasting ‘Nin Inch Nails’ after coating your intestines with Irish Car Bombs will quickly turn your thought-provoking piece of writing into random DNA finger painting.

            Thankfully, I’ve formed a rough plan to continue this politically incorrect bullet train well into the New Year. I’ve been fortunate at this point to know my ranting has NOT been politically, religiously or monetarily skewed or filtered in any way. Some articles will be better than others, some will be reviews, some will be rants, some more offensive or more perverted than others. But this isn’t going to be how you view the world; it’s going to be how I view it. However your thoughts on subjects or maybe your experiences are certainly welcome.

        So as the sticky notes begin to pile up about what could be my next article, I’m happy to say that I’ve somehow drawn a conclusion to this mess, at least in my head anyway. I continue to seek out what I find interesting and often delicious, like Anthony Bourdain, but on a much tighter budget…and no TV deal.