Positive Sarcasm Presents: "The Blame Game"
It's all Donald Trump's fault.
Everything that happened from the moment your alarm clock failed to go off to when Alexa forgot to scramble your vegan egg whites, to when Starbucks failed to whip the foam on your unaffordable latte, all his fault. From the moment your weak-ass parents failed to fill up your gas tank making you late for your pointless intership for the fifth time, so you had to stay late and miss your follow up med check visit with Dr Feelgood, so now they won't refill your prescription of Lorazepam.
...Donnie's Fault.
It's easy to blame a notorious real estate con-man even when he shines a spotlight on our Den of Thieves, also known as Congress, so when that fast food eatin fat fuck catches the "Flu-han Virus", CNN "Covid News Network" wished for his death. Instead the doctors filled him full of vitamin D-Bol or whatever the fuck and sent him off to go steal more gold coins from Sonic The Hedgehog. Amazing that China's managed to Genocide over one million Uigher Muslims with IUD's, make Democracy in Hong Kong dissapear in under one year, but when it comes to America's former fuck boy, they just can't seem to get the lethal dosage right...I'm sure there's a math joke in here somewhere.
When we stopped blaming God for our problems, we started blaming our parents.
When stopped blaming our parents, we started blaming our politicians.
Fast forward to now we are blaming our neighbors. In the hood, they call that being a "Hater". Pardon my whiteness, saw the verbage an episode of Chappelle's Show.
Blues Clues, stupid...it's not your neighbors fault for your shitty life, your massive college debt, your underemployment, your hemorroids from a lack of cruciferous vegetables.
It's never wise to root for politicians like they give you points in a congressional fantasy league, leaving you less time to focus on your Tik Tokking tweener daughter as she cosplays up her followers between the ages of 42 - 57 with another questionable post to "wax their helmets" to.
Now after your your daughter suffers a nip slip in her new Sailor moon outfit and some unhappily married Dad in Pasadena finishes punching his clown for the fifth time cuz he's in day six of COVID quarantine, all that data is then shoved thru a giant coaxial cable and sent off to a State Fusion Center where this information is processed thru an algorythm created by programming team comprised of diversity hire dumbasses and due to programming error, Sailor Moon is now classified as a domestic terrorist and banned from all commercial airline flights, so she won't be visiting grandma in Westchester anytime soon.
...Grandma died 3 months later of "COVID Complications" because Governor Greaseball Cuomo forced her back inside with her rapey caretaker and no access to fresh air or sunlight.
As my ever increasing anti-social anxiety begins to fray on the edges of my sanity, I will leave you with these final words...
...value the time you have right now at this very moment and ignore every single point of compensated authority that stands to justify their bloated paycheck by keeping you down, cus this freedom of individuality train doesn't seem to be arriving safely at the station. It's about ready to derail and take the entire country with it, all because you decided to blame that one person...that wasn't in the mirror.
Have a great day.
